Those were the days ... Yeah, good times

I was having a cup of joe with some friends of mine who I had worked with over the years. Our paths crossed, occasionally, so we shared some of the lighter moments and had a few laughs. Here are some of them - no specific names or places, just good times:

  • Remember when Jones came out of the dugout all ripped by that skinny guy calling first base? Yeah, he argued so hard that two other umps had to come over and cool things down … then Jones lost his teeth and they feel on the skin … then everybody just took one step back, just staring at the ground and Jones’ teeth! Best part was … Jones never skipped a beat – kept on jawing … but nobody could understand a word he said!

  • Remember the time when Jones put all those small cans of spray paint in the other locker room and took all the labels off and replaced them by gluing RIGHT-GUARD deodorant labels on.

  • Or, how about the time when Jones put a dab of manure in the umps mud.

  • Remember when Mackie got the equipment all mixed up - half of us had home uniforms while the other had away. Jones went out for the ground rules meeting and the plate ump asks “ what’s with this?” Jones tells him “ well it’s like this … half of us are here … the other half aren’t”.

-Remember the time we had a lady ump at home plate. Yeah, Jones went out for the grounds rules meeting and as they start talking doesn’t he stop everything and apologize for some language that he used. When the plate ump asked why he was doing that, Jones digs himself in even deeper by saying… “ oh, I didn’t notice that you were a lady … I mean not a lady … a woman … I mean with all that equipment on … I mean without the makeup and stuff … I mean the equipment … no not lady stuff equipment … I mean the way you look … “ If ever I saw a guy write his own obits … Jones did a good job all by himself.

  • Remember the time when overcast skies delayed our game and the umps decided to go for anyway. First batter up and the sky lets lose with a bolt of bright and a crack that sends everybody ducking for cover. Jones comes out of the dug out and yells over to the crew…” I think you better listen to him” as he points upward.

Coach B.

I believe that was Coach Gabby Johnson not Jones:

Those were the days, all right.
I know so many baseball stories I don’t know where to start—so many incidents both crazy and otherwise. But let me begin with one that just came to mind, here at 1:51 A.M. This one comes from the National League; I believe it was the New York Giants of the 1930s. They had a manager who was deeply disturbed because the team was playing such lousy baseball, and he got it into his head that the problem was dental. So he decreed that every one of the players was to go see the dentist and get their choppers checked. They all went, all except one who showed up at the ballpark one day, and as he was about to go out to the outfield and shag some fly balls the manager stopped him and started yelling at him because he alone hadn’t gone to the dentist. Whereupon the player reached into his mouth, yanked out a full set of false teeth, shoved them into the manager’s hand and snapped "Here, YOU take them to him and find out what’s wrong with them!"
And then there was the incident at Yankee Stadium when Allie Reynolds was pitching against the Red Sox, and Dick Wakefield was at the plate. Suddenly Wakefield became very agitated and started waving the bat back and forth, and then he charged the mound, and everybody thought that he was going to whack the pitcher to kingdom come. But it turned out that Wakefield wasn’t after Reynolds. He was after gnats. A whole swarm of them. They were all over the infield, all over the pitcher’s mound, and all over home plate, and time had to be called while the infielders, the groundskeepers, the umpires, just about everybody else, chased the pesky insects out of the ballpark. And finally, when play resumed, Wakefield belted a double.
Remember Bobo Newsom? He was around for quite a while. One day he boasted to all and sundry that he knew Joe DiMaggio’s batting weakness, and he would demonstrate the next time he faced the Yankees. Well, his opportunity came, and he was pitching against the Yankees. The first time DiMag came to bat, he doubled off the right-field wall. His next time at bat, he doubled off the left-field wall. His third time at bat, the Yankee Clipper cleared the bases with a double deep into center field. That was it for Bobo, and he was taken out of the game. When asked if he had found DiMaggio’s weakness, he said he had. Doubles.
Yes…those were the days. :slight_smile: 8)