"My son is 17 years old and a Jr in HS. He is a RHP, 1B and 3B player. He has a low ERA and is the 2nd top pitcher on his team. This is his 2nd yr in Varsity and is doing well. His coach tends to use him against the bigger schools/teams because of his control and speed"
I don't see a problem here. For a 17 year old, he's doing pretty good. In fact, in a small town, to be holding his own like this is superior. Besides, not only is he holding his own on the field, but, he seems to manage the coaching environment - a environment that's not all that unique to everyone else.
I'd suggest leaving your son to his own devices, his handling "it", and easy does it with the counsel. As a young man, he's now into that space of maturing manhood that requires either solving his own problems, a kind of "walk it off - deal with it", or not. And on that note, I'd bet that he does that anyway. Either way, your son is managing his place in space on the field like he will, on his own someday. A thick-skin kind of mantel that every youngster gets, experience by experience. that's what makes the transition from a boy to a man.
I can assume that my words here come as no comfort or compass. But then, your observations are the sensitive kind that only a mother, who cares very much for her son, can give. To be on the sidelines and observe that kind of bond is something that I haven't witnessed, not in my career. So, I ask for your indulgence if my words are course around the edges - I don't mean to insult or be insensitive.