Catcher's Chatter


#1

When your catcher gets behind the plate, and a batter steps in, does he “chatter,” you know, like saying …

  • hey, those are nice spikes … my girlfriend has a pair just like-em.
  • hey, those uniforms that you guys have are neat , my girlfriend has some just like-em.
  • hey, you guys can borrow some of our bats if you need-em, yours can’t seem to find the ball.
  • hey, if you swing and miss at this one, you guys can leave early and miss all that traffic.
  • hey, no one ever remembers who came in second place, so if you send somebody over to the scorekeeper now, so at least they’ll spell your names right.
  • hey, I recognize your coach, he was our coach once … just once … that explains why he’s coaching you guys.
  • hey, so far so good … we’re good and you guys are just so far …
  • hey, ya know … every time you guys get up to bat, we never hear …don’t let your hot dogs get cold.
  • hey, don’t trip on the baseline on your way back…

#2

Clean Uniform: Those pants are clean. Your Mom did a nice job.
Previously Struck Out: Maybe give it a try from the other side this time?
Generic: Ask him what pitch he wants, then call it. Next pitch do the same, but lie.
Generic: Hey bud, which hitters are your good ones?
Swing and Miss: It’s really hot back here, could you do that again for me?
Got a Hit Last Time: Nice hit last time. Do you inhale or exhale on your stride?
Lead off hitter Righty on Righty or Lefty on Lefty: He’s missing inside with his fastball, just so you know. Then call a front door curve.
Too Much Eye Black: Nice eye black. Do you own the stock?
Too Much Eye Black: Your mascara is running